Why i'm here
Some people hate this city, some people love this city: to me, it’s just a city I want something from. I don’t even know if it’s here, one thing I do know is that no one guaranteed it to me at the agriculture checkpoint on the drive in to California. My name’s Rob Banks and I’ve been here for two years now.
I’m originally from Cleveland, Ohio and I moved to Los Angeles in November of 2013. I drove a Chevy pickup across the desolate I-40 Interstate with only two radio stations and neither of them were in English. At every gas station a homeless man would greet me with a hello and a very predictable question. I’d usually say no or I’d leave to another gas station across the street, and as I’d fill up my gas tank I’d watch the same homeless person cross the street and ask me again. All I want to say is thanks to those homeless people; I made it to Los Angeles in record timing.
I moved into a house in Calabasas with 16 people. I stayed in what was originally the dining room and I shared it with a guy who owned a flower shop in Santa Monica. That house always had different people living in it: there were French filmmakers who made a documentary about me, a college football star from Colorado who later came to be one of my good friends, and there was also a Hollywood producer who worked with big names but was just down on his luck…and we all had to pay $550 a month to an actor who does asylum films, and ya, I mean the shitty ones like Sharknado. It was truly a welcoming to the city of angels, something I’d never forget or regret.
Hollywood never sold me though; hearing about a city that makes people rich and famous, you’d expect bricks of gold paving the street and Hollywood legends that could never die. In a way, it’s like that but the complete opposite, there’s just people dressed like Hollywood legends and the homeless people who I had been running from along I-40 seemed to have clones of themselves there, and the bricks that were yellow weren’t gold. But this didn’t stop me from taking my mother to show her where I wanted to live one day; she didn’t have the nicest reaction as you thought she would.
One city my mother really liked was Burbank, and I don’t disagree, I enjoy Burbank quite a bit. From the two AMC theaters to Flappers Comedy Club, it’s a place that offers everything I love: overpriced movie tickets and stand-up comedy. That’s where I began my stand-up comedy endeavor, Flappers Comedy Club. The first day I moved to Los Angeles, I came to this club to bomb in front of my 16 roommates who wanted to come watch, they probably wanted to move out after my performance but that’s where I was; the bottom. I don’t know if I’m still at the bottom all I really know is that people are laughing at what I’m saying so I must be doing something right and I intend to keep doing that until I die. -Rob Banks 2/27/2016
I think everyone has there own definition of crime. I believe it’s safe to say most people don’t like it. My definition of crime is that it’s a business ran on fear and pure luck. It also has to do with what you’re committing and the circumstances around it. I could probably steal the statue of liberty if there weren’t 8 million people living next to it, so that’s not a possibility right now, maybe in a couple years when I have some extra helicopters laying around and the people of NYC decide to move to Tennessee, then it could be a possibility.
Honestly, I like stealing stuff. That doesn’t mean I do it though, just like how there’s people out there who like to create mass murders but instead they turn on The American Bible Challenge and drink Keystone. I love the idea of taking something that isn’t yours because then you don’t have to pay for it. I know, I’m cheap, but who wouldn’t want to save a few bucks here and there.
I don’t think Marijuana should be illegal or even considered a crime. I feel confident to say though, one fourth of the people in this country think it’s a crime and there should be a punishment for doing it. Right now, I feel like Marijuana could be completely legalized in the next 20 years. But, what does that mean for us as a country, we are a nation based on freedom. Does that mean there is a possibility that other illegal drugs could become legal, or should we only let Amsterdam have that obligation to this world.
If we did legalize, for example, Cocaine, one thing that is for sure is that there would be a tax on it. The Government could make money off of selling it or other people selling it. Now, I know it would be a terrible thing for the government to do it to it’s own people, but if people are going to do it anyway then we could at least try to get out of a national debt. Also, if these drug crimes that people commit that are illegal become legal, then it’s safe to say the rate of crime would go down as well.
This is just a thought though from a comic in Los Angeles, who has really no drug or political experience and is probably wrong about all of this, but one thing that is for certain is that it would be foolish to not consider this or even have the thought, because we are a country that should stick together, not drift apart. -Rob Banks 3/21/2016